Promtacular!

State Fair O’Hara

Posted on July 21, 2010 by promtacular! in 1980s Prom, 1990s Prom, Aquanet!, Backdrop FAIL, Bizarre Backdrops, Lace Disgrace, Oh Bows, On The Plantation, Pairing With White, Prom or Costume?, Shine On!, perms | No Comments

Year: Totally Doesn’t Matter.

You know. Once you get past the onslaught of this photo’s amazing Promtacular! explosions, it offers you a secret gift. I almost missed it myself until I tilted my screen just so. Oh, it’s magnificent. But let’s address the obvious first, shall we?

Her dress. Her shiny, lacy, pink Scarlett-O’Hara-meets-State-Fair dress. I don’t even– what IS that material? It is reflecting the camera flash, and not even in a satin-shiny kind of way. More like in a cellophane-shiny kind of way. Which is just utterly amazing. It’s like she wanted to look like cotton candy that she brought back from the State Fair wrapped in cellophane.

And not just cotton candy wrapped in cellophane. Cotton candy covered in a fancy, fancy napkin, wrapped in cellophane. At the State Fair.

Complete with State Fair Hair!

Because, as a gift to me from the Prom Gods, her hair is higher than her face is long. No, no. This is not me being funny. This is actually true. Get out your ruler. Measure from the bottom of her chin to the top of her head. Now measure where her bangs start to the top of her head-cascade. IS THAT NOT IMPRESSIVE?

Oh, and while I’m all-caps-ing at you, may I also ask: WHERE IN GOD’S NAME IS THIS PHOTO TAKEN?

Was their prom in “the study” on the set of the board game Clue?

Was their prom in the office of the University President?

Perhaps their prom was in the Captain’s Quarters of the Titanic?

I just…what?

It makes me feel bad for them — happy as they are — because there isn’t a single tacky streamer or fake flower or floating flower vase or Mardi Gras mask anywhere in sight. You know what there is, though? I’m certain that just off to the side, there’s a globe. And a model ship in a glass case.

Prom in the Hall of Records.

THE SECRET GIFT

Did you guess it? Do you know what it is?

This girl’s date at first looks cute and sweet and a little dorky (entirely the fault of the era-acceptable glasses), until you look closer at his hair line. Not the one along his forehead. The one along the line of OHMYGOD HIS HAIR IS AS HIGH AS HERS!!!

How does that even happen? It’s a Promtacular! miracle!

Disco Stu & Stoner O’Hara

Posted on June 15, 2010 by promtacular! in 1970s prom, Backdrop FAIL, Mullets, On The Plantation, Prom or Costume? | 2 Comments

Year: 1970s

This photo was originally posted here, submitted by Cheryl. She writes, “My husband’s prom picture, ‘John & Joan,’ isn’t too bad, but don’t you just LOVE that crushed velvet jacket???”

Oh, come now, Cheryl. “Isn’t too bad” doesn’t do this masterpiece justice.

The crushed velvet — in sexy, sexy brown — is a fabulous starting point, sure. But did you happen to notice that it’s been paired with a ruffled shirt and ruffled man-hair to match? Really? You have nothing to say about the state of your husband’s hair in this photo? It’s like he’s wearing man ringlets! RINGLETS!

And now that I’ve shouted RINGLETS! at you, may I draw your attention to Joan.

Joan! She has ringlets! Like, the real kind! To go with her Scarlet O’Hara dress. Because for no reason! But what I love the most about the dress is that it’s totally in the On The Plantation style, but toned down to be 70s-appropriate. BRILLIANT! And while she has created fantastic ringlet-y curls, she’s still letting her hair fall into her face.

As for the backdrop, well. You tell me: high school or someone’s house? Either way, I love that it’s not a plain brick wall: it’s a brick wall with candles. That makes it festive and totally prom-appropriate.

Right?

Special Weekend Edition: As Though They’d Never Even MET Before

Posted on April 02, 2010 by promtacular! in 1990s Prom, Oh Bows, On The Plantation, Prom or Costume?, Shine On! | 6 Comments

Year: 1990

So happy to have this submission from Julie Marsh (who blogs here and is part of the awesome CoolMomPicks team)! She writes: i’m with the skater dude – his mom insisted that he wear a tux. my best friend jamie is the flapper. her date – marine 1 – is a guy she met on vaca. before he was a marine, he was a bmx biker. he brought along a friend – marine 2 – for our friend alyssa, who looks like an Israeli princess version of Scarlett O’Hara.

You know, since the dawn of time, teenaged BFFs have done everything alike. Hair, clothes, makeup, shoes. Some variation may occur, but not much and not often.

For that reason, I find this photo EXTRA AMAZING. Each couple is Promtacular! in their own right, and without so much as a nod to the other two couples. There are two couples where the man-half is a MARINE IN UNIFORM, and yet they still manage to look like they’ve never seen each other before in their lives and are going to two entirely separate occasions. Astounding!

Couple #1 (on the left) appears to be going to a Cotillion. Also, that’s a LOT of bows. Bows on the skirt, giant bow at the boobs, and for good measure? A bow on each shoulder. Shall we make a bet as to whether there was a bow on the bustle? Because I think it would be unavoidable.

Couple #2 (in the middle) is going to a Halloween Ball. He is dressing up as a (very believable) Marine, and she is going as a 1920s Flapper with 1980s hair. Because authenticity isn’t as important as hair flouf.

Couple #3 (on the right) appears to be heading to an actual prom, although from the looks of Julie’s dress, which is rather shiny and heavy(?), perhaps the prom is in Alaska. Or, um, January. Also, as I look closer at the shiny purple skirt, I have to ask: are those…stripes? The skirt sash/bow is striped? Because that just takes the dress to a new level of awesome.

Of course, the best part of this whole photo is that there’s about 3″ separating Julie and her date from having the exact same hair style. Still, they look great as they are. I mean, everyone knows that showing your entire right eye is just soooo 1989.

Special shout-out to Julie whose subject heading was: PROMG! because I totally tried to name this site PROMG! but the URL wasn’t available.

Italian Wedding-Cake Topper

Posted on March 30, 2010 by promtacular! in 1980s Prom, Aquanet!, Blame the Photographer, Going to the Chapel(?), Lace Disgrace, On The Plantation | 3 Comments

Year: 1986

I don’t know what it was about 1986 that made prom attendees think they should dress like brides and pose in front of cars while staring into the sun (see “A Bird In The Hand” below, but why ask why? The results are fantastic.

This photo was (perhaps understandably) submitted anonymously with the message: The hair, the makeup, the dress, the date… looking back, it’s a challenge to pinpoint which of those is the worst mistake.

Aww. I don’t know if I’d say the dress was a “mistake.” It’s really quite awe-inspiring. That is a LOT of white lace to fit into one look. And just when you think it might be too reminiscent of a doily? BAM! Red tablecloth to the rescue!

I am a little concerned about this woman’s date, as he seems to be gripping her for dear life. Perhaps he’s afraid her skirt will catch wind and she’ll fly away? Maybe he had a fear of cameras? Or limos? Or maybe he just wanted to be sure he could catch a good whiff of her hair product. It just looks as though he’s saying, “Darling, you look lovely. But DON’T MOVE.”

p.s. I used to work in an Italian bakery. This is exactly what the cake-topper bridal couples looked like. The bridesmaids — also included on the giant, tiered cakes — would have been wearing the same dress except entirely in red.